Gym, Tan, Blog

   I would like to again apologize for being such a neglectful blogger. Life has been so crazy... I dont even know where I left off let alone where to begin. My sister and I moved two weeks ago which has been great but has also totally thrown my routine completely off. Its also taking Reese and I some time to adjust to my sisters odd schedule. (more Reese then me, she barks every night at 3am when Rachael comes home) But its great...my sister and I have a great relationship and its nice to see more of each other now.
   School has been a blur to be honest. I cant believe we graduate in 19 days. EEEKKK. We suffered through hazmat week which was pure torture. Fought car, brush, and a dumpster fire at the tower.  Put out 65ft flames at the propane burn. Got pepper sprayed with the police cadets (not the worst thing ever, but pretty bad for about an hour) uuhhhh what else.... went to the pool today for water rescue class.
I forgot to tell everyone about the guns vs hoses competition... So for the last seven years the police and fire academies have competed against each other in 5 events for a trophy. Basketball, volleyball, dodge ball, soccer, and football in a best of 5 format... and all seven years the fire academy has won the trophy (no pressure right) SO we started out horribly...losing volleyball and basketball... but we are on the comeback trail with a strong showing in dodge ball and soccer being our next event. The competition has been great for class morale... we started getting real bitchy and tired of each other so its been nice to come together and have some fun.
   In the next 19 days I have a EMT final, a fire final, a Hazmat state exam, an EMT state practical exam, and a state fire practical. After I pass my practicals I will have to take my state EMT and Fire written exams at the end of may. Don't pass the tests... don't get certified. Don't get certified.... don't get a job. With all that end mind I have to cut this short and study. I'm sorry its so short. I will again smooth over my slacking blogging with photos....

propane burn (very cool)

Love her. Love you all.

 

Back to bloggin...

Helllloooo! Sorry its been a minute since I last wrote. Lifes been a blur the last few weeks... some of it was business some of it was booze :) great times though. OK. SO, since the last blog...  School has been going great. We've been to the burn tower twice since returning from spring break. Yesterdays trip was especially challenging. We had to carry whats called a hotel pack (100ft of hose bundled up in straps) up tot he sixth floor of the tower and back down...then connect to a standpipe (2" pipe in the wall) charge the line and crawl down into the basement to squirt water. Basement fire are notorious for being some of the meanest, nastiest fires there are... I was backing up my squad member on the nozzle and we were having a hard time finding the door to the basement when I began to feel heat on my knees... heat from the basement below was heating up the floor we were crawling on... the concrete floor. (crazy hot when we finally made it down to the fire)
   We had our PT midterm...so we had to re-run the timed mile and a half and re-do the pushups and sit ups. I took 9 seconds  off my run time but only managed 61 pushups and 50 situps : / a little disappointed about that but still not terrible. I did my clinical shift in the ER the other weekend and I gotta say it was pretty cool. Really gross at certain points but overall it was a pretty sweet way to spend 12 hours on a saturday.
  We are in the final stretch... just 5 more weeks until graduation. Things start getting crazy...so much to do. 5 more tests, hazmat week, fire station clinical, move, two more trips to the tower, state practical exams... STRESS. They wouldn't call it the hardest four months of your life for nothin though right..
     We've got our second go'round with the CPAT tomorrow morning. I've already passed but I would like to get my time down some (I only passed by 3 seconds the first time) Then its the weekend!! GB night tomorrow... very excited to see my B's. I need to study some... next weekend is jam packed with an alumni soccer game and moving into the new place so there wont be much time for anything else.
...and now for a little photo montage.....................
                                  School picture (my mom insisted I order some lol)

                               This is what Reese does when Im trying to study :)

                                          Rusty's buggy!!!! Watch out world!!!

                      And last but not least....Reese eating a bacon flavored sucker :)

  Hope all is well!!!
Love.

Back to it.

   Funny how weeks of school can sometimes drag by but I blinked and spring break is over. It was a great week though. Rusty started me off right with a vintage Rus-Meg sunday funday... there really isnt anything better than a solid day drinking sunday with your best friend. Subsequently, I spent all day monday recovering. Wednesday my lovely sister and I went apartment searching (exhausting). Made for a long day but we found a place. At falcon falls where I used to work actually,but it is the best apartment we found all day with the best price so I am VERY happy to announce that we will be moving in the next couple weeks when I find some time. Went to Jen and Andi's wednesday night for a evening of deck sitting and story telling (always very entertaining)... love those girls. St. Patty's day finally arrived thursday and my B's and I dominated its life. Its all pretty fuzzy so I dont have many details to offer up but Im sure you can imagine what kind of day we had....so good I couldn't get off the couch friday lol. I went to Ericas saturday for some bridesmaids duties and to catch up with my girls.. and followed that up with a trip to Tegans for one last night of inebriation. And that was the cliff notes version of my week off school.
   So back on the grind tomorrow. Exactly 60 days until graduation (I have a countdown on my phone :) Im trying hard to focus on the task in front of me and not at the end of the road. I dont want to look too far ahead and trip on whats right in front of me. I've unfortunately been very scatter brained as of late. My lack of focus is annoying. People who know me know that Im a rather emotional person... which is something I actually really like about myself. I think that allowing yourself to feel life is the only way to truly live it but Im finding myself tangled in my feelings sometimes. Its distracting. But thats just the way my I work I guess... always something on my mind.
   The second half of the academy will go by fast I think. There is a bit less classroom work and more trips to the burn tower and skills practice and stuff. Im doing a 12 hour clinical shift in the ER this weekend so that should be fun. I think I have like 7 or 8 exams left. I'm actually excited to get back to work. Spring break was great but I felt lazy most of it. And I ate and drank too much. I need to get back at it and get my body right (summer will be here soon after all) The second half of my journey is sure to be filled with more hard work and sleepless nights but will turn out to be worth it in the end.
   I hope everyone I didn't have a chance to catch up with over my break is doing well, and I'm sorry we didn't have a chance to get together. Two more short months and I wont be quite so busy. Thanks to everyone who I did get to see, it was certainly a great morale boost for me and just what I needed to head back to school refreshed. (although a little fattier than when I left :)
Love.
  

Halftime.

Hello ladies and gents.
   As you may recall today is the beginning of my week long hiatus from school. And yes, I am spending my first night of spring break at home writing this blog. And yes, I am keeping a glass of wine company. And yes, Im completely and totally content. I am first class, grade A exhausted... too tired to go out regardless of my "spring breaker" status. It was a long week... short notice test on Thursday made what I though would be an easy week not so easy. I told that short notice test to shove it though..93% on minimal studying (yeah!) Today was pretty awesome. We went to a salvage yard and spent the day cutting up cars. I got to use the jaws of life and the hydraulic cutters... we had a durango disassembled and in half in like 15 minutes. It was a gorgeous day...65 and sunny. Although we were in full gear so it was pretty freakin hot and those tools are seriously heavy. So needless to say a chill Friday at home is in order for real. Besides, I have a full week to let loose :) :) :) :) 
   Moving on....to continue my football analogy we've made it to halftime. First and second quarters are in the books. And right in time might I add, I desperately needed a break. So as your halftime commentator I will run through the highlights from the first half...
   The first quarter started out with yours truly being scared out of my mind. Unsure of myself, unsure of what to expect, unsure what I had gotten myself into. But me being the usual bull by the horns bitch I am, I offered myself up to be the class president and was chosen as such over the class douche. After a few weeks we all settled into our roles and got the hang of things. I've already gotten to do so much cool shit.... carry grown men down ladders, use thermal imaging cameras, go into actual burning buildings, cut cars in half, etc. It has been so much hard work but a ton of fun at the same time. The second quarter was more of the same. Aside from our daily quizzes we have taken 4 large exams and I am pleased to announce that I am the only person in the class to have scored A's on every test. Im certainly not well known for my academic ambitions but I made a promise to myself before I began this program to really push myself in the classroom. And I must admit it feels pretty good.  I am a bit more well known for my physical abilities I suppose... not to say that I wasn't nervous about that aspect of this program. I honestly just expected to really struggle to keep up with my male counterparts. Lucky for me they didn't take showing up in shape very seriously and have made me look like a beast...although in my defense I worked my ass off before I started and have continued to do so throughout. That hard work paid off with my passing of the CPAT on the first try which was a huge relief. Of all the things that I have accomplished during this first half of school I think the thing I am most proud of is that I have been able to gain the trust and respect of my classmates as their leader. This was quite a daunting task to undertake seeings that our class is 24 men and 4 women, with an age range of 45 to 19, and guys who did serious time in the military, and so on and so forth. Im sure not everyone likes me, and I'm sure some of my classmates think I'm just a power hungry bitch. But the fact of the matter is that as a whole the class is behind me, they trust me, and they listen which is unbelievably humbling and gratifying. 
   Just as I figured I would I have learned so much about myself over the last two months. Or perhaps learned isn't the right word. Perhaps confirmation is a better way to look at it. I always thought I was capable... those thoughts were just seeping with doubt. Over the last couple months I have begun to wipe that doubt away and I am beginning to find my stride as self assured individual. Probably the hardest and longest two months of my life... Been a pretty brutal 5 months dating back to the end of 2010 actually. But a rolling stone gathers no moss... I just keep fighting the good fight ...and taking the path less traveled... (insert any other over used figure of speech about life here)
   To round out this highlight reel I will leave you with some memorable moments....

~ to set the scene, we were all standing around before PT and I was saying how my shoulder was hurting lately and a classmate says "well cant you just go to the shop and get that fixed?" to which I reply "huh?" and he said "well you are the terminator, cant you just go get your parts replaced" we all had a nice laugh about that one and now half the class calls me the terminator.
~ I made the mistake of telling everyone how I am to be a bridesmaid in June for Erica's wedding and how I'm going to look silly in a dress with these shoulders. My Chief caught wind of this also and one day when we were being punished with push ups he yells at all of us to drop... and then says "time for us to do some "bridesman" push ups. Nice. That's the running joke as of late.
~ Another time during PT we were getting punishedfor sucking and I was getting pretty irritated...So I start yelling at the class and my chief while laughing at us states..."uh oh, Mamma's getting upset"...I about died lol. 

I would just like to say thank you again to everyone for all the love and support. As hard as I've been working and pushing myself  I would still be no where without my amazing friends and family. Your motivation and encouragement mean more to me than I could ever truly express.
~Love

oh, p.s. I can't wait to relax and see everyone over spring break!!

good thing i can sleep when i die.

FRIDAY! FRIDAY! FRIDAY! Did I mention its Friday? and I'm happy about it? What a crazy week. 2 huge exams, and a trip to the burn tower. I tried to spend last weekend studying but I was suffering from a serious lack of motivation. I think I spent more time looking at my books than actually reading them. But all is well. My test Tuesday wasn't as hard as I was expecting... I received a 93%, which I was happy with since I didn't go nuts studying for it.
   Wednesday was our first trip down to the burn tower. KCFD allows our class to use their training facility down off front street. We arrived there at 8am and got to work right away. There were five stations set up that we rotated through. The stations consisted of a fire attack, rehab, ventilation, ladders, and a maze. The maze station was just that.. we, while in full gear (including air tanks) and blind, had to make our way through a maze designed to simulate being stuck in a debris field (wires, tunnels,stairs) there was a portion with a tunnel so small you had to take your air pack off and push it ahead of you to make it through. It was quite challenging but really fun... finally paid off to be small :) The ladder station was just practice for raising and climbing. We went about 35' up which doesn't seem like a lot but it sure felt like a lot when I was up there in the wind. We had to use a leg lock (stick your foot through and under the rung below you) and lean back just holding ourselves with that one leg. Ventilation was just practice using axes and chainsaws. The rehab station was for the group finishing the fire attack to rest and rehydrate. Now, on to the real fun stuff... being the class president my squad is afforded certain luxuries...i.e getting to go to fire attack first. The burn tower is basically a 7 story cement block. We were only in the first floor of the tower in one room. The fire was made using a stack of wooden pallets lit with torches. So, we were in attack groups of 3. The chief asked if we were ready and I said yes sir and he said "then why the hell is the nozzle still on the ground?" All three of us proceeded to stare at each other  for a second in hesitation until I reached down and picked it up. We crouched up next to the door of the tower and clipped in our regulators. Chief explained checking the doors for heat and then we went in. My heart was damn near beating out of my chest. Not out of fear but out of pure childlike excitement. The funny thing about wear an SCBA is that you become keenly aware of your breathing because of the noise made when you inhale and your regulator releases the air. So my heart is racing and im breathing like I just ran a race...when in reality  I crawled about 40ft. We come to the next door and I again check it for heat... its warm (through my fire gloves) so I turn around and yell "we got heat, we got heat" to my crew so they know we had a fire and that I was going to open the door. I open the door and there it is...my first live fire. It wasn't huge, probably like the size of two big campfires but it was still so exciting. And hot. We are required to crawl at all times but chief gave us permission to stand up briefly to feel the difference in the thermal layer. I was instructed to go in the burning room and spray water on the right wall (we couldn't totally extinguish the fire since the other groups had to go after us) so I begin to crawl in and my backup man proceeded behind me. I couldn't for the of me get the nozzle pointed to towards the right wall...I felt so weak... and as i struggle to get it turned my backup man keeps inching me towards the fire. We're talking like less than a foot for this giant pile of burning wood. And in my mind I didn't think something seemed right but what did I know? not much. I was my first time doing this. So the chief backs us out and then explains that the backup man cant follow the nozzle holder into the room because it makes it impossible to get the hose turned properly. SO, I  felt better knowing I wasn't a weakling and I wasn't the one doing something wrong. He then looked at me and asked if I was ok...hinting at the fact that I was too close to the flames. My other chief followed us out and again asked me if I was alright...and he's not known for being an overly caring guy so I really knew I must have been too close. Anyway... sorry to make a long story long. The burn tower was great... great to finally get out of class and great to finally get some real fire. 
   After a long day at the tower I had to drag my butt home and study for the first big fire exam. 12 chapters... 6 weeks of information. Barf. Wednesday-Thursday Im pretty sure I singlehandidly supported the coffee industry. Maybe like 7 hours of sleep over the two days. Sit down to take my test this morning and I don't know the first question. Awesome. Im thinking all this studying was for nothing. 100 question test... and I was only confident about like 75 of my answers. My anxieties didn't get the best of me in the end though. I scored a 90% (highest in the class, holler :)  Super solid week!!!!!! Have a great weekend!
Off to see my besties tomorrow!!!!
Love

Fried-day

Hello Hello.
Meggy here.
   Good-ness its been a long week. I wasnt sure I would make it to Friday. My brain, my body, and my spirit are spent. Im trying to think of whats been going on since my last post....
I fired the vice prez which made me rather popular with the rest of the class. Apparently they had the same disdain for him that I did lol. What else.. Oh. I went bowling last weekend with JTHT, Andi, and the clowns. I wasn't quite the bowler I remembered myself being but I still had a pretty solid performance and a nice little night away from stress. Not too much else exciting has been happening. Just the usual sleep, class, study, repeat. I was suppose to have an EMT exam yesterday but it was moved to Tuesday which makes next week a monster. EMT exam on tuesday over 7 chapters and my first fire exam over everything we've covered since january 19th (like 12 chapters) SO.. this means that I get to spend my weekend reading (blah) But its ok...it will make next week go by way more faster-like.
THEN...after the week from hell....its time for.....drum roll please
   Rusty MuthaFu**in Sower's birthday 2011!!!! Im pretty freakin excited. I miss my friends so much and I will be so ready for a night out...Im hopeful for some vintage B shenanigans.
   I had to finally break down and ask my parents to lend me some money. :-/ I really didnt want to but I was left with no choice. I still have a few weeks before the rest of my loan is disbursed and babygirl has gotta pay the bills. So thankfully my parents are amazing and have been nothing but accommodating while Ive been in school...and I eat every bit of food in the house and they never say a word lol. Its always cute when my dad and I are pouring our coffee together at 5am. (Im such a daddy's girl deep down :)
   Anyway....sorry for the totally random blog post this time around. Its a pretty accurate reflection of how my mind is currently functioning though. Off to cuddle with my books for a bit and then SLEEP.
Love

Today was a good day (...in my Ice Cube voice)

Hiiiiiii.......
I hope everyone is doing well.
  
   My week is has been really good. Long as usual but really good. I think I finally got Reese feeling better. I took her to the vet...which sucked super hard. They didnt really tell me anything and Reese was a total psycho-spaz the whole time we were there. They gave her some dewormer to be safe and then bent us over with the bill. She wasn't eating her puppy food...only a few bites all day so I think she ended up vomiting early in the mornings from her stomach churning around on itself. I took her off the puppy food and promoted her to a natural adult dog food for dogs with sensitive stomachs. She ate that shit right up and seems to be doing much better....and just in time, I couldn't handle her hurling every morning at 3am anymore.
   
    A good week so far at school as well...academically I'm am still holding strong...averaging like 97% on my quizzes I think. And although our quizzes are really easy its still nice to ball out on them. Monday we had to do our first PT assessment. It consisted of a timed mile and a half run, push ups and sit ups. We ran the mile and a half on the track; which when your legs are as short as mine is total torture but I will take 6 track laps outside over 18 laps inside our academy building. We are required to pass the run in under 13 minutes so I was pretty stoked when I crushed that time finishing in 11:27... and I dont know if you have ever seen a midget run but 11:27 is a pretty solid time. (and better than quite a few of the boys) After the run we went back to the gym to do out push ups and sit ups.  We had a minute to do as many push ups as possible, the same with sit ups. The boys had to do their push ups down enough for their chest to touch to a persons fist who was placed under them... us chickies had to do them down enough for our chin to touch a fist on the ground (not that my boobs are big enough to create an advantage lol) We only had to do 35 to be considered passing so I wasn't worried about it. I smoked out 64...  my PT instructor made a huge deal about it... mostly to make the guys who could only do 15 (yeah we actually had a guy only do 15) look stupid. Sit ups were cake... Im not even sure how many I did.. enough to pass. SO... long story long monday was good, I was really happy to start my week that way. 

   Tuesday was EMT class. BORING. Thats all about that.
  
   Our first CPAT was today. I was pretty pumped about doing it so I was bright eyed and bushy tailed at 5am. Get to school all ready to own it, only to find out that the gym was taken and we would  have to wait until after 1 o'clock. Awesome. I had to help proctor the rest of the class member's tests which gave me another 3 hours to watch them all go through it...watching some of the guys struggle was slowing draining my confidence. The two other girls in my class went before me, neither one of them passed...great. So then its finally my turn to go. My instructor reminds me Im the class president and I need to represent (thanks for the added pressure, because the pressure from myself and classmates wasnt enough) I will try to explain this test as well as possible without writing a novel.

Station one is a 3:20sec walk on the stair stepper while wearing a 50lbs weighted vest and 25lbs of added weight. (this was a LONG three and half minutes) then the 25lbs of added weight are removed and you complete the remainder of the test with the 50lbs vest on.

Between every station you must walk 85ft

Station two is the hose drag. You must grab the nozzle and hose (150ft of hose) over your shoulder, and run down and around the barrel. Then you have to take a knee and pull, hand over hand, another 50ft of hose.

Walk 85ft

Station three you have to pick up a chain saw and rotary saw from a shelf and carry it down around the barrel and put them back on the shelf.

Walk 85ft

Station four is the ladder raise. You have to raise a 25ft ladder up rung by rung up the wall, then move over to another extension ladder and raise the extension all the way up and all the way down.

Walk 85ft

Station five is the forced entry station. You must take a 12lbs sledgehammer and hit this plate thing until the buzzer goes off (this is when I really started getting tired)

walk 85ft

Station six is the maze crawl. Which is exactly that... you have to crawl through a pitch black maze with obstacles in it.

Walk 85ft

Station seven is the dummy drag. You must drag the 165lbs dummy by the harness handles down 45ft, around a barrel and back. (Im totally miserable now)

walk 85ft

The eighth and final station is the breach and pull. You must take a pike pole (long pole with a point and a hook) and you have to push up three times on a weighted panel and pull down five times on a weighted bar. That is repeated four times. I was so gassed at this point....starting to see spots and shit. That vest just worked me. To be considered passing a candidate must complete the entire test in under 10:20sec. 

What was my time you ask?????

Oh, you know, 10:17. :)

Im even extra excited because I found out today that if I happened to get hurt and cannot take the test next time I will be able to use this time even though it was a practice CPAT. I was happy to hear this because flag football starts in a few weeks and I was really paranoid about getting hurt playing while in school. Now no worries!!

".....Today I didn't even have to use my A.K.
I gotta say it was a good day"

Love.

murderous rampage

   I would first like to start this post by saying holler!!!! tomorrow is Friday!!! I couldn't be happier (sigh)
Its been such a long week.... If you recall I spent all last weekend studying for my 2 quizzes Monday and first big EMT test Tuesday. Well my labor intensive weekend paid off with the murder of all three. 90%,100%, and 112% respectively. So it goes without saying that I am pretty happy.
   Monday we had our first real practical skills day... hose loading, hose rolling, air packs, ropes. Pretty nice since after our quizzes we were in the gym working on those things the rest of the day... faarrrr better than sitting in lecture for 8 hours.We had our first female instructor Monday as well which was great for me to finally have someone to give me girly pointers...about my hair and being smaller and stuff...she was awesome. One of my instructors pulled me aside after class Monday and told me how good of a job I was doing and told me that myself and the other little tiny girl in my class are the best at PT. He said he is confident we will pass our physical agility test but that he wants to give us some help on some of the skills we may have trouble with due to our size. So next week we will have our first practice CPAT (candidate physical agility test)....Im excited to see how I do.
   Yesterday we worked on ladder drills. Lifting, carrying, climbing, rescues, etc. We had a grand old time filled with inappropriate jokes surrounding the butt man (the firefighter who stands under the ladder for stabilization). I carried a grown man down a 16 foot ladder twice. It was pretty entertaining. The first of the two rescue carries involves the victim (grown man) facing outward at the top of the ladder with the rescuer (me) climbing up to said victim. I put my arms under his armpits and then have him sit on my knee that I have between his legs. So the idea is that you hold the victim up with your arms, move your foot down to the next ladder rung and then slide them down onto your knee. This was quite entertaining because my victim was a decent sized guy and I was grinding my knee around in his crotch...hard not to laugh the whole way down. That carry is actually pretty difficult for me though because the distance between my arms and knees is pretty short... the second carry is easier. It begins the same with the grown man victim facing outward at the top and little ole' me climbing up to face him. I stick my arm between his legs and grasp the ladder behind him on one side and put my other arm under his armpit. He then swings both legs off to the side of the ladder to where I am kinda cradling him like a baby. The guy I performed this rescue on is like 5'10'' probably 160-165lbs...he looked nervous lol. But I totally killed it and he was smiling and telling everyone how strong I am by the time we got down. Pretty good feeling :)
   We had our CPR training class today which wasn't as boring as I expected and now I can give you basic life saving if necessary (and as long as you don't have any communicable diseases ;) As I stated earlier tomorrow is Friday!!! I'm excited to have a couple days "off" even though there is some studying that will need to be done. Out tomorrow night for Kenny's birthday and out saturday for Jen's birthday... Im a broke college student right now so going out doesn't have quite the same meaning as it usually does but I'm still totally stoked to see my friends. I miss everyone so much while I'm trapped on this island (Liberty,mo)
   I hope you all had good weeks as well!!!! Keep on keepin on.....
Love

a notion of sorts

   Call a rant or whatever, I dont care.
   Far too often in my life I am surprised by people when I shouldn't be. I am rarely wrong about people and their character... maybe thats good, maybe not so much. Im not sure why I continue to insist people are not as they seem when I am proven time and time again that people are exactly as they seem. Maybe its my terribly naive optimism, maybe its me not wanting to see the cold truth.
   Or perhaps its just me. Perhaps my perception of everyone is some insanely skewed, clouded version of them. Am I too generous?? Too generous with my feelings?? Too generous with my effort? Im finding myself totally lost within myself and who I should be. Most people totally suck so do I continue to give to people who have little to no concern for me? I go out of my way everyday for someone...friend, a family member, a stranger.... that is not to say I do anything for anyone in order to get something in return. Thats not the case. I know I have things to offer people, whether its family or friends or strangers and I like doing things for people. I am just starting to wonder about karma... does what go around really come around??? And if i does then why do I keep finding myself covered in dirt?? do I just accept the fact that maybe Im the anomaly? Do I lower my expectations?
   I dont feel like I should have to. Maybe everyone else should stop sucking. Maybe I will lower my expectations of other people and leave my expectations for myself high. That way when I am surprised by people surpassing my expectations for them it will be a pleasant surprise. Yeah, I like that idea... assume you are shitty and then when you turn out not to be it will be a nice surprise.
   I hate that I have taken on such a pessimistic approach. Its just not my style to rock a dark cloud instead of the sunshine but I am forced to rely on my experience and the fact the history usually repeats itself.  I know I will shake it... probably when the actual sun comes out lol...I could use a good run in the sun, its always my best therapy.
   Anyway...rant complete. I feel better.
   Superbowl sunday ya'll!! Enjoy it. Im trying to. Studying most of the day... two quizzes tomorrow and my first big test tuesday. Im thinkin I'll study until 4 and go to Rusty's for a little while to get out of the house and see my bitches, I miss them dearly and could use some friend time.
Love 

Snowy Boredom

   Im on my second snow day in a row... Its nice not waking up at 5am but its been a long time since I sat at home for two days. Yes I know I could have gotten tons of studying done but I have been having a really hard time getting motivated. These days off have gotten me out of my studying rhythm.

   So since my last post....lets see.... I didnt do much of anything over the weekend. Reese was sick, waking up early in the morning vomiting since friday. So I stayed home to keep an eye on her, I think she is feeling better now though. Monday we had class as usual... lecture about ethics in the fire service which was more interesting than I expected. We also got all our bunker gear on and did a little drill in the gym. We got into our squads and had to pull out three down firefighters that were in the mens locker room. All the lights were out so it was pitch black and we were not allowed to stand up. The goal was to simulate what its like inside a fire.The gear is so hot, I cannot imagine how hot it will be once we get to the burn tower and are actually in a fire.

    We lost our first classmate on monday also, this particular recruit was struggling both physically and the chief advised them it would be in their best interest to drop and get there money back. I had a nice talk with chief and he was very complimentary about how well I was doing which was a nice confidence boost. I also discussed with him about a possible change in the class vice president who I dont mesh with all too well. (and by not mesh I mean if I had to choose between running razor blades under my fingernails or having dinner with him I would take the blades.) So Im hopeful that situation will be remedied by the week's end. We were released from school early Monday due to the ice developing and then snowmageddon hit and I felt like a 4th grader again rifling through news channels to find my school on the ticker. Snow days are great but they are having an adverse effect on my ass... Im SO guilty of boredom eating. It wouldnt be so bad if I could go running but clearly thats not an option. Tony got a new truck and he was itching to take it out so he, Cristin and Layne make the trip up to liberty and freed me from my snowy prison. We found the one open bar in liberty and posted up for happy hour. It was so nice to get out and have some human contact that I desperately needed. Inebriation soon followed since I dont drink a ton anymore but I knew school was cancelled today so I gave myself the night too have fun. Nothing too crazy anyway...home by 9:30 in bed by 10.

   Back on the grind today as I am going to force myself to read some and get back in my academy ass kicking flow. Thank you all for all the support, it really means a lot. Oh, and a special thanks to ang and kp for my awesome care package!

p.s. I wasnt intentionally flipping my dad off while he took that picture...just happened to come out that way :)

humpday update...

   Howdy. Its Wednesday January 26th 2011, approximately 10:33pm. I just completed my 5 hours of studying for the night... Well kinda five hours... took Reese on a short run, ate some food. Things have been going pretty well all things considered. I think I left you last time with a brief rundown of my first day of class. Today was my fourth day at the academy... yesterday was my first day of EMT training. Monday Wednesday Friday are fire school days and tuesday thursday are EMT days. On fire days I  have to get up at 5am...We have to be at school, dressed, and ready for PT (physical training) by 7:20. As class prez I am responsible for leading stretches. As you may recall from my previous posts I was pretty conce rned about PT and how I would do with the fellas. WELL.... turns out I didnt have much to worry about at all. I was totally and completely shocked after our first PT last friday. There are guys in my class who struggled mightily just to get through the warmup. It is not an exaggeration to say that of the 30 recruits in my class I am physically in the top 6 or 7... Its seriously baffelling how out of shape some of these people are. Cant do pushups, cant do basic cardio, cant walk and chew gum... So with all that said I am feeling MUCH better about dominating the physical aspects. Class on the otherhand is a bit more nerve racking. On fire days we are in class from 9:30 to 5 and EMT days from 8-5. So you can imagine how much information they are throwing at us in that time. Pretty overwhelming. I aced my first two fire quizez on wednesday and have my first EMT quizes tomorrow. We have at least one quiz everyday and if our grade average drops below 75% we can be removed from the program (eeek)
   We were issued our bunker gear today (fire pants/coat/boots) as well as our respirator facepiece. It was quite interesting trying to find shit that fit me properly but worked out pretty well since I ended up getting nearly new equiptment. We will be getting our first hands on experience on friday when we get out the SCBA (self-contained-breathing-apparatus)... which we just call air paks usually. I will bring my gear home this weekend and try to get a picture up maybe... I havent actually seen myself in it so Im a little courious myself.
   The routine is getting rather diffucult already... getting up early. being in class ALL day. studying ALL night. But hopefully now that we have drudged through the kinda boring beginning stuff it will get easier. The program is almost exactly 4 months long so to cater to my meathead-jock tendencies I am breaking it down into quarters. If you start a game slow in the first quarter you generally F**k yourself for the whole game so Im trying desperately not to start flat. Studying is like practice... if you learn your plays you win... if you're prepared you win. So Ive just gotta stay my ass at practice and win this bitch. All I do is win win win no matter what.
love
  

Academy Day 1

   Well folks day one is in the books. Went pretty well. Mostly orientation stuff. I am happy to report I was selected by my peers to be the class president. This basically means my workload will now double. Im not sure what all my responsibilities will be but the Chief assured me its a large responsibility. Which I guess is good but I also learned today that I am only one of eight people in the class who have not taken the EMT part of the program. So this means I will have class M-F while the majority of the class will only have class M-W-F. My plate is more than full. Im hopefull I can handle it as I basically voulnteered myself to be president....otherwise I will get removed from the position and duck out with my tail between my legs.
   Im not as worried about the fitness stuff...I am pretty confident I am in better shape than atleast half the class (30, 26 men-4 women) And one girl is even smaller than me which I definately didnt expect. 
   Lots to read so I gotta go. Hoping for a snow day tomorrow so I can try to get my mind around all this work.
love 

Game on...

   Well the big day is finally here. Fire academy day 1 is Wednesday at 7:30am. It has been such a long time coming for me. The process to get in the program is painfully arduous... physicals and applications and vaccinations and waiting lists and financial aid... I began the process like a year and a half ago so its pretty surreal for me right now. My recent unforeseen life changes are weighing especially heavy on my heart the last day or so... Its funny how we all know life will never ever go according to plan but we still struggle when things don't follow our vision. This is certainly not the way I saw myself spending the days leading up to my first day and I'd be lying if I told you it wasn't hard. But just as we all know things will never ever go according to plan we also know that with change comes opportunity. I have before me such an incredible opportunity to find out what I'm made of... self discovery is nothing short of inevitable as I begin to write the next chapter of this crazy life of mine.
   I am so blessed to have such a great group of people in my corner. My family and friends have been so supportive and encouraging as I have become increasingly more anxious about starting the academy. Nervous is kind of an understatement. I have been in a lot of high anxiety situations as an athlete (national tournaments..super bowls..Johnson county parks and rec flag football dynasties)but the nerves are different now. Sports are sports and always meant a lot to me but this is my life... the outcome will have a legitimate impact on the rest of my life. The pressure is pretty intense. The unknown is whats really got me shaken up right now. I don't know anything except to show up in uniform at 7:30. I'm such a psycho planner-aheader so not knowing whats going to happen is driving me crazy. Everything you can think of is running through my head... Am I in good enough shape? Will I be able to hold my own with 35 grown men?? Do I remember how to read? I'm not saying I'm not confident... To quote Lil Wayne "..confidence is a stain they can't wipe off" Clearly a lack of confidence has never been a problem for me. I'm just nervous.
   I was out with some friends yesterday and I was talking to a girl I had just met about school. She was asking me questions about it and then she says "Isn't there like a height requirement? Aren't firefighters like six foot 220 pound guys?" So I kindly explained to her that there is not height/weight requirement and that we will all have to pass the same tests. I just know people are going to take one look at all 5ft nothin-125 pounds of me and think I'm a joke. And I hope they do. I hope everyone sleeps on me. Yeah I look 17, yeah I'm a touch on the petite side, but I'm also the biggest don't-judge-a-book by-its-cover Bitch they will probably ever meet. I love having doubters... It makes success all that much sweeter. I told some friends this over the weekend...But remember in fifth grade when you have to write out what you wanted to be when you grow up? Well my goofy little ass wrote that I wanted to play in the NFL or  be a firefighter. So four years of semi-pro football later I find myself knocking on the door of my second "what I'm gonna be when I grow up". I think that's pretty awesome.. there aren't too many people who can say they did what they set out to do in fifth grade.
   I read this quote that's pretty perfect for me...
"Change is the essence of life. Be willing to surrender what you are for what you could become.” I am so excited about where I'm going and what I will become.
   Much love to everyone... thank you for the support. At the request of my B I will try to post a little something a couple times a week to keep you all abreast. <--- ha, I said a-breast :)
  
  

Bloggin it...

     I figured for my first post I would just take a second to reflect on why I am writing this here blog. In less than a week I will begin an intensive four month program to become a firefighter. With that being said my habitual use of facebook will be drastically limited... (insert blog here) I think it will be much easier for me to chronicle my journey and keep my loved ones updated this way. It wont be exclusively about school, but more about me and what/how I'm doing. I make no promises of correct grammar, spelling, insight fullness, humor, etc...
     I assume the people who are reading this understand my blog title but in the event its not clear I offer the following...

antics

n pl antics [ˈӕntiks]

odd or amusing behaviour

also see..

antics

plural noun clowning, tricks, mischief, frolics, escapades, foolishness, tomfoolery

(definitions and synonyms from thefreedictionary.com)